misterbrief | 1st Taunt

Entry tags:

1st Taunt | Voice/Action

[Action]

[His clothing had finally arrived, and Vegeta's streaking through the sky, a blue trail of energy in his wake. He finally reaches the shop in a huff, catching himself with a left foot and balancing with a right as he lands.]

[Inside, he's berating the poor person running the shop-]

You-! Are my belongings finally in stock in this pathetic little dump you call a store!?

[He soon after stomps out, clothing in hand, reaching the middle of the square. But he doesn't take off right away, still brooding over his arrival in Luceti.]

[In fact, throws his clothes down onto the ground in a rage and takes out the journal he'd woken up with a few days prior.]

[During his short voice entry, he searches his back and finds his wing, still yelling into the device, yanking on it with teeth gritted. He falls to his knees, face completely blue as the shining ocean itself and is desperately trying to hold back vomiting as a few feathers or so float down beside him.]

[He'll be there for a short while before he regains the strength to stand up and walk again, back to his apartment.]

[Voice]

Listen, I don't know exactly why I've found myself here, but I am tired of this ridiculous game. I demand I be returned back to West City before I decide that I'm going to get some therapy from blasting someone. And these ludicrous wings-! They can't be removed, huh? Well we'll see about that!

[A groan and the ruffle of feathers- followed by a cry out as he's reaching back and yanking on the wing on his left side. Over the audio there's a thud and the sound of a throat holding back what one could probably assume was his lunch.]

Argh! You can't...be serious...!

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Vegeta? Ah, Vegetable.

You may address me as Loki Laufeyson, god of mischief, Vegetable.

[It never occurred to him that his name fit the beginning of that word exactly. Never.

Neither did it occur to him ever that his brother's name fit the end of that word almost exactly. Tarble.]

[And in that second, Vegeta put two and two together and never before had he been so angry at his father.]

Named after produce!? [His rage meets a height that hadn't been reached since the moment before he'd reached the status of Super Saiyan. And Loki, that rage is aimed at you]

How dare you! How dare you mock my Saiyan ancestry! God or not I'm going to get some therapy out on you!

Hush, Vegetable, you are damaging my ears. Please try to calm down, yes? It is not so bad to be named after edible plants.

[He chuckles softly. He could make use of this...]

And how am I mocking your ancestry when your parents are responsible for giving you your name? If everything, you should aim your anger at them, you see?

Tccch. Your ears will be the least of your worries! [He's practically frothing at this point.]

[And he is so not even going into anything regarding his family.] Shut up! Regardless, if you continue to call me that I'll blast you halfway to oblivion!

Don't you have something better to do than annoy me?

[Now his threats become downright preposterous and Loki has a hard time to hide his laughter.]

At this point there is absolutely not anything better I can do. Consider yourself lucky, you see?

Tell me, Vegetable, are you perhaps...a very bad, tough guy?

Oh yes, I've certainly won the lotto on this one. [There's an audible scoff over the comm. And he keeps calling him Vegetable.]

I don't know, you tell me. I'd be more than happy to show you.

Aye! I like that spirit, Vegetable.

I live in apartmentbuilding five, on the fifth floor, room twenty five. I will take care of sandwiches and tea.

Of course I will also work on a spell to cure you of your receeding hairline.

[He lowers his voice to a whisper.]

That will not work well with the maidens. And yes, you may thank me later.

Do you honestly think I want to come over and have tea and sandwiches with you!? [This kid is out of his mind if he thinks Vegeta even wants to be near him.]

[There is just tons of angry noises coming out of the comm now.] Shut up! First of all, a Saiyan's hair does not change from the day they are born, so you can forget about that! Plus, I don't need any help from you with women-! [Guy is married, after all.] But thank you for telling me where you live so I can make sure that location doesn't exist anymore, you little runt!

Why wouldn't you? I make excellent sandwiches. You will find yourself astonished with the fact that honey and bacon makes an excellent combination.

[Oh, how much fun Loki has right now. Vegetable truly had an anger problem.]

Do not fret, I will make camomille tea for you, it tends to calm the mind, you see?

[He raises his eyebrows at the last threat.]

A Saiyan? Are you an alien from a realm beyond the Nine Realms? If so, does your homeplanet looks like a rather large chunk of broccoli? It would be fitting, you see?

And please do not do that.

[The last comment about his planet resembling broccoli finally sets the Saiyan off, anger reaching a new high that passed beyond how sick he felt from the assault on his wings. A strange sound similar to the hum of energy followed by air whipping through the mic on the journal filters in through the comm.

It is then proceeded by an angry yell, stomping footsteps up a stairway, until the infuriated Prince arrives in front of Loki's door in his apartment in Community House Five.]

[In which the door is ripped from its hinges, slamming against the wall directly behind, revealing a very red faced, huffing, angry Prince, consumed in a blue energy- palm aimed right at the young god.]

You think that's funny don't you!? I'm going to teach you some manners, you annoying little brat-!

[After Loki lost contact with Vegetable he closes the journal and heads for the kitchen to make hideous sandwiches that have more to do with combining an interesting variety of ingredients than actual sandwiches and some tea. After all, Loki promised, and Loki is all about promises.

Only thing is that he did not expect to lose his door again. And my, is Vegetable small. A really tiny man with a lot of muscles. Maybe his homeplanet was inhabited by tiny men with a lot of muscles named after vegetables.

While Vegetable rants Loki chews thoughtfully on his sandwich, looking at the hand aimed at him.]

Are you going to pummel me, Vegetable?

[He puts his hand down but the energy doesn't dissipate as Vegeta stomps right into the room, a hand flying out in an attempt to grab Loki by his shirt.]

If you don't cut it out I'll do more than that-! [One of the veins in his massive forehead pops out as his teeth grit harder.] One more comment about carrots, peas, lettuce, or anything of the sort is going to result in a nice workout session with your body, and I promise it's going to hurt.

[And if he'd gotten a hold of Loki at this point, this is where he would release him, angrily folding his arms over his chest, glaring with full force at the god.]

[Loki utters a small 'yelp'-sound when Vegeta grabs his shirt and tilts him up. Still, he definitely isn't scared. After all, back in Asgard this happened on a daily base.]

My word. Such a bully.

[He taps his chin briefly.]

Are tomatoes a vegetable as well? I have always wondered such a thing, yet I am still unsure. Do you know the answer? I am at a loss, you see?

[A second vein joins the first, eyes closing in complete fury at the question. Of course he knows the answer- no, it's not a vegetable- but he avoids answering it.]

I don't know, why don't you try looking it up. [Vegeta is shaking with rage now.]

[This small muscled man has a serious anger problem.]

Calm down, it is a mere question, nothing more, you see?

[He points at him...]

By Odin's sores, you are a bad liar.

[...and offers him a most dubious sandwich afterwards.]

But are tomatoes a vegetable?

[He lets the energy fade, holding his arms tighter against his chest, turning a head to the side while still keeping one eye on the nuisance before him.]

[And being called out? He doesn't say anything to it because it was true, so instead the Prince continues his ongoing glare; that royal nose going up in the air.]

[But the question remains and the sandwich extended. Internally there was a battle between swatting the sandwich out of his hand in frustration, but on the other hand, a Saiyan's stomach is one of the largest and most dangerous black holes in the universe, if you were an edible item.]

No, it's a fruit. [And said food item is swiped from Loki, meeting the end of its short sad life in two chomps as it ran down the gullet of the Saiyan Prince.]

Any other irritating questions for me?

By Odin's beard, I have never seen someone consume sustenance with such remarkable speed.

[Really, Vegeta, you should not have asked that. Especially since Loki is already grinning again because you have answered his first question so very truthfully.]

Absolutely, Vegetable.

[Loki points at the couch.]

Please sit down and let me get some tea for you.

[And so he turns around and pours tea for the small muscled man named after food inside a large mug and finally hands him said mug, a friendly smile on his face. After that he sticks out his hand, expecting Vegeta to shake it.]

Allow me to properly introduce myself since it is most uncouth to not do so when inviting a stranger into one's place. My name is Loki Laufeyson from the house of Odin.

[Vegeta, however, does not sit- he'd prefer to stand, as is. He does take the mug, sipping from it, without a single thank you. The hand extended out in front of him is ignored though, a lazy eye glancing down at it with disinterest.

If he'd been in a "good" mood for what would be considered good for the irritable Prince, he might of taken it. But as it stands, Loki has annoyed Vegeta to no end, thus leaving the god with an empty palm hanging in midair, while he continued to sip on the tea.]

Quit calling me Vegetable! I am Vegeta, Prince of all Saiyans. And you've already told me your name, God of Mischief. [He peers at Loki from over the rim of the mug.]

And what kind of moron do you take me for? You, a god? I could squash you underneath my thumb! [He doesn't have very good manners when it comes to this kind of thing, nor does he believe in gods.]

Prince of all Saiyans? All? How many Saiyans are currently here in the land of Luceti, Prince Vegetable of Planet Saiyan?

[Loki withdraws his hand and goes to sit on the couch with his own tea, carefully dipping a sandwich in said tea.]

According to Midgardian mythology the god Loki belongs to the pantheon of Norse gods, you see? And I do not believe that. Even though you have an impressive build, you are also rather short, Prince Vegetable of Planet Saiyan, therefore your thumb is too small to be used for crushing me.

Will you cut that nonsense out! It's Vegeta, Prince Vegeta, do you hear me?! Clean out your ears! From Planet Vegeta, you little punk! [And he's also going to avoid even thinking about Kakarot, let alone telling Loki that there was another Saiyan in Luceti.]

[And then, he called him short. Short.]

Speak for yourself, squirt! [Yes, the steam is -almost- visible. He's barely managed to keep from spilling his tea all over himself from all the shaking he's doing.]

And I couldn't care less about who's mythology says what. [He still has no idea what Midgard is.] They can keep all their silly beliefs to themselves- I'll have nothing to do with it.

[He pauses for a minute, an angry tap tap tap on the floor with his boot.] You'd be surprised what I can do with my pinky alone.

You are named after your planet? Or is your planet named after you, Prince Vegeta the Saiyan of Planet Vegeta.

And yes, I hear you. I think everyone can hear you. And I mean absolutely everyone.

[Loki listens to him and pulls a face, a hand rubbing his ear.]

But I am a mere teen, you cannot expect me to be as tall as an adult, you see? You, on the other hand, you are a fullgrown man. [A chuckle] A sayman, yes?

[After the last statement Loki looks at Vegeta for a very long time.]

Prove it to me.

[He smiles the brightest and most sincere smile he can muster. Loki has noticed he's rather good at feigning smiles.]

[He's had it up to here with this kid, god or not, and Loki just gave him a perfect opportunity to get a little frustration out.]

[So he looks for anything metal. Preferably dense, too. But the best he can find is the bed frame. He walks over to it, putting the tea down; and places his pinky on top of the frame at the head of the bed- and bends it, creaking and snapping under the pressure, until it finally gives way and curls with the finger. But he doesn't stop there; Vegeta makes sure there's lots of pinky-induced damages to the top of the frame of the bed so Loki could remember.]

At this rate you're not going to have much left of a living space. [He spins around and rests his arms back across his chest. Not the most impressive thing he can do with his pinky but that's as good as it gets without being in actual combat. And he feels a little better having broken part of Loki's bed.]

Now, enough of these questions. I think you've got a little explaining to do yourself. [He picks the tea back up, impatiently sipping more of it.] If you're a god, then what exactly is it that you can do? So far all you've managed to prove to me is that you could possibly be the most irritating creature known to the universe.

[Loki keeps his eyes onto Vegeta while he walks through the room and finally disappears into his bedroom.

And when the other does so Loki gets up and follows him, watching when Vegeta starts bending the steel of his bed with, indeed, his pinkie.
Most impressive and you deserve an applause, Vegeta. So that is what you are getting.

An applause.]

Bravo, Prince Vegeta the Saiyan! My compliments for having such a powerful pinkie! Are you able to crush my nightstand with only your big toe?

[He claps enthusiastically, smiling from ear to ear. It was a bit of a guilty pleasure to get kicks out of incredibly stupid others. All muscles and strength, no brains.]

I am not very fond of questions, Prince Vegeta the Saiyan. Yet, I do think an answer is in order. Listen as I will reveil all my super powers.

[And those were...none. But a god of lies would not be a god of lies if he could not tell an amazing lie.]

I am an expert sorcerer. Very powerful. No wands needed.

Edited 2013-01-25 11:54 (UTC)

Are you now? [He sits himself on the bed next to him, debating on actually crushing Loki's nightstand as well, but decides against it.]

I've already faced a powerful sorcerer, and needless to say he was killed. [His level of impressed is pretty low.] I find it funny that all these powerful magic beings tend to be on the short side. [Because Babidi was pretty small- smaller than you, Loki!]

[So a leg comes up and crosses his other leg, arm propping itself on his knee and letting his chin fall into his hand.] So do I get a preview of your little magic show or should I just be on my way? [And he's calling Loki's bluff- no reason to believe yet that Loki has any powers at all.]

Oh but I am most convinced about your power, Vegeta the Saiyan. Hence you prattle about it almost non-stop, you see?

[Loki leans against the wall, still busy with consuming his sandwich.]

I am a mere teen, one cannot expect me to be the size of an adult. But I believe I have told you this already.

[He nods at Vegeta's request.]

But first I shall refill your tea and in the meanwhile you can tell me exciting stories about your home planet.

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[voice] head in hands forever

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[voice] --- [action]

[action][that was the weirdest english in my previous tag TAT]

[action] Naw, don't worry about it silly

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