misterbrief | 5th Taunt

[It's been a little over a week now since Vegeta's disappearance, and thankfully for him at the moment they've decided to simply dump him in the woods where no one can see him.

Or rather, her.]

[His eyes open finally. How long had he been here passed out? Either way, it didn't matter and he finally was out of the hands of those misbegotten scientists. It was really too bad he couldn't kill them whenever they took him, he wishes he could. His head is cloudy and he's awfully groggy still, searching for the journal next to him. Vegeta soon discovers that his hand...his whole arm wasn't that familiar mass of muscle belonging to his arm. It was still muscular but toned and...

...HOLY COSMOS...

Cue the shocked look as he looks down, feeling the recognition of a dress settled on his body rather than the pants he should be wearing hits him. He had breasts. What in the galaxy he had breasts.

What have they done!? He was a woman! Could the Malnosso honestly think of anything more humiliating than this!? How did they expect him to go home looking like a girl? He's never going to hear the end of it! Bulma and Bulla would never let him live it down until the end of time! Why him, honestly?]

Voice

[Ok. He's female now. It's fine. Wait no it's not fine. It's not fine, no no no no no it's awful and it's horrible. This will not be permanent, but who knows how long this will last. One small problem though...how does he dress himself? He mulls over that in his head, it couldn't be that bad. The pants and shirt aren't hard, but...underwear? Bras? He's simply got no clue, he doesn't know what size he is anymore in the hips and he definitely doesn't know his bust. Perhaps he should ask his family.

No, that is a horrible idea, give them more fuel for the fire to make fun of him relentlessly. He can dress himself without their help. However his attempts at finding something that fits is a complete failure so far. And he can't wear his Saiyan armor, he wore it in the draft and many different people saw him in it. The last thing he wants is people to figure out who he is.

He could ask Luceti? They won't know the difference, will they? And he does not feel bad about deceiving anyone on the matter either. He cannot believe he is going this far, but to him it's better than having yet another thing on the plate to be made fun of at home. So he's going to choose voice for this one.]

Luceti, let me ask you this. In what way here have you found it easiest to shop for appropriate attire, including your undergarments? I know this may sound strange but where I am from we had a uniform and armor that we all wore as we were constantly in and out of battle at any given moment. [Yes, that sounded generic enough. Playing the military card, and it wasn't really that much of a lie either. But he will lie if he has to, for the love of the universe.] So as you can imagine this is quite new to me. [Except the whole part where it's not, only for the fact that he can't figure out how to put on a damn bra. Girls, help him!]

Action

Clothing Shop
[He'll be attempting to find himself something other than the New Feather dress he's got on, and he needs to try to find undergarments as well- have fun running into him there.]

Seventh Heaven/Around the Square
[He'll be heading over to the restaurant, since he's also starving, so after the dilemma of wearing the appropriate clothing is sorted out he's heading over there. He'll be in the plaza before he gets lunch to mull over how he's going to return home to his wife and child to face the music.]

Battle Dome
[No matter what gender he is he'll still train like usual that night in the dome, if you'd prefer to meet him there.]

House 29
[Mostly for Goku, Bulla and Bulma if they choose this spot to meet him, but if you know where he lives and want to drop by he'll be there as well.]

((OoC: Yeah, Vegeta's been turned into a girl. Karma's a bitch right? So responses will be coming from

doesntneedsaving!))

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

No I wasn't a test tube! I was born, alright? There was this one guy that was kinda a bit like a father, just no real mother figure, you know?

...and do you really not know anything about women's underwear?

You a virgin or something? [Hi pot. Nice day we're having here kettle.]

[He's starting to wonder who in Luceti doesn't have some sort of weird story growing up. Honestly, his parents were killed when he was little. People on the journals have mentioned their own. What a depressing place this was sometimes.]

For your information I've got plenty of experience in the bedroom! It's just that I've got an entirely new body to deal with and I've, you know, never been a woman before!? Did you ever think of that!?

Neither have I! But I think I'd know enough not to go shouting about someone sizing me up all over the journals!

Are you trying to insinuate that I went on the journal to complain about males eyeing me!? [That's not what Vash means but Vegeta is obviously taking it completely the wrong way with the sizing up comment.] The only reason I asked was because this entire side show of a village is irritatingly friendly and I know that I'd get an answer somewhere so I could fix my own problem of being in this body!

Do you even realize how uncomfortable it is to wear a bra that is far too small for you?! No, you wouldn't would you!? So don't get on me!

[Vash slams his hands over his ears with a look of almost pure horror on his face.]

WHAT THE HELL! I DON'T WANT TO BE THINKING OF THAT ABOUT YOU!

[Just picture that as Meryl or Nami. Just... anyone but Vegeta.]

Would you cut it out!? [He's starting to think Vash is more uncomfortable about this whole situation than he is at the moment. Where is the logic in this argument, really. Probably nowhere to be found, the Prince of all Saiyans is a woman and Vash was going to try to help him panty shop. Nope, wtf is logic.]

Get a hold of yourself! I was just giving you an example, I wasn't expecting you to get a picture of it in your mind! Now cut it out and act like a sensible Plant!

Hey, in this case I think I'm acting like a perfectly sensible straight man. Thank you very much.

[He could mention that Vegeta doesn't even know what Plants ARE, maybe he was really acting like a sensible one. Of course, that would also have to lead into talking about himself and he'd rather not.]

[Yeah, he still doesn't know why his race is called Plants, but hey, even he looked human without his tail so he just assumes in Vash's world they name things strangely. He really doesn't care much otherwise. He's still far more interested in that power he sensed from him a few months back.]

Fine. I suppose I'll be thankful you're not gawking at me like a letch. There's plenty of those back where I'm from as is. And quite frankly they are some of the most disgusting beings I've ever come across. You'd probably get along with them very well in fact. [In which he pulls a face.]

Yeah, yeah. Whatever. [He's turning to leave.] You just have your fun picking out underwear or whatever. I want no part in this anymore.

[He certainly doesn't want Vash to help him, so he's not stopping him from leaving, but he will call out to him.]

Of course not, it's no fun when they're not actually a female now are they?! [Honestly he's just being super grouchy because he's a girl and because of the dirty squad back at home who have a constant nosebleed over hot women. And he finds them to be completely abominable.]

[Vash raises a hand to wave without turning back as he heads towards Good Spirits.] You sure got that one right!

[He'll just let him go. And fume. All the fuming. He's so angry now that he's going to have to destroy something later to get some frustration out. Because this situation? This sucks.]

Edited 2013-04-24 07:13 (UTC)

5th Taunt | Voice/Action

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