misterbrief | 6th Taunt

[It's been a few days since Father's Day. And he got a really nice surprise from his daughter that he never thought possible. Bulla training and honing her skills and power, it really meant something to him; so he's flipping his journal open now since Luceti played a large part of it. He's not even angry this time.]

It's come to my attention that a good number of you had a hand in the gift I received over the weekend. I will say I'm impressed- the lot of you have done the impossible with my daughter Bulla and it most certainly paid off. So for that...[His voice trails off, since saying these sorts of things isn't exactly natural to him.] For that I am grateful. I know a good portion of the time we are safe inside this barrier, but you must understand that I worry for her safety regardless.

So I suppose this is the part where I ask something else not so specific. The gift I received was for your Earthling holiday Father's Day. I've never put much stock in such things, but this last weekend certainly has changed my mind about it a little. Is this something you also observe in your own worlds? And if so, what is it that you've done or would do that you would consider worthy of your father?

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[ Tenten might learn it. Or might not. She's too prideful with her weapons to let anyone but Tsunade trained people run around barefisted. ]

I care about how I appear to others only because I want to remain presentable. No one's going to hire a ninja to take care of other things if she can't take care of herself. [ She sighs. ] However, I think she might be a better match with my roommate if that's the case. I'll have to introduce them, since they'd probably be up all night giving each other makeovers. [ Tenten's a bit of a tomboy but she'll indulge in this. However, tossing Ino in there might be all the fun and then some. ]

As long as the two of them do their makeovers somewhere else. It's bad enough that her fashion club meets at my home, any more than that and I think I'd rather be run over by an intergalactic freight train than put up with more of that than I have to.

Besides, wouldn't you agree that there's much better things to do? [Hahahaha like training because that's like the only thing to do on his list save sleeping and eating.]

A fashion club doesn't sound like that bad of an idea, but I think it's kinda obsolete since we have someone that runs a tailoring business here, right? [ Whatever. She won't stop her colleagues from pursuing harmless make up ideas. ]

Well, yeah, of course. But, for most circumstances, there's always something better to do.

Great, if there's a tailoring business that just means they'll get together one day and make my life more miserable. [So much bad news, this is awful.]

By the way, Tenten, I've been meaning to ask you about this little incident I had a while back with you. Or rather, a ninja claiming to be your 'twin'.

Maybe she'll be too demanding and get kicked out! [ yes, tenten is actually trying to be optimistic here in the weirdest way...

but her tone and facial expression immediately sour up with Vegeta's mention of her evil twin. ]

Ugh, don't remind me of her. I just found her obnoxiously gloating at my room when I woke up and we fought to the death. Then, a couple of hours later, we fought to the death again. And again. And Again... [ You can cut her off any time now Vegeta. ]

Yes, yes yes. I get it! [Totally going to cut her off.] So much for her knowing your weakness. She seemed pretty confident she'd make mincemeat out of you.

Yeah, well I felt the same. I've already dealt with a clone once but this one was a little trickier to deal with because she had drive to outdo me. We basically ended up killing each other repeatedly during the course of the shift. The last one ended when I stuffed her body down a chimney and then lit an explosive. [ She's glad that was the final death. ]

[He blinks a few times. Both at the stuffing her down a chimney and the killing of each other over and over again. He's not doubting that, because this is Luceti we're talking about but he kind of wishes he'd of known about that before the shift ended. He would have liked to of killed Kakarot a few times before he was sent home for good. Since, well, he wouldn't stay dead.]

Well that's certainly a creative way to help someone find the end of their life. You should have gotten Santa involved too, I'm sure he would have been of great help. [That way of killing someone is definitely not his style, but whatever- if Tenten wants to kill people in strange ways, that's fine by him, as long as they die.]

[ It's okay, Vegeta. The next time he shows up, Tenten and Vegeta can kill Kakarot together!! ]

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<small>[ It's okay, Vegeta. The next time he shows up, Tenten and Vegeta can kill Kakarot together!! ]<s/mall>

Santa...? <small>[ what is that even... ]</small> Nah, it's okay. I just had to make sure she's dead, you know? I'm not even sure if the house was abandoned or not. <small>[ at least, she hopes it wasn't in use because what a surprise that would be! ]

Who cares if the house was abandoned or not. If it's not then at least someone will be around to play clean-up crew for that dead body you've got stuffed in their chimney. What an excellent Christmas gift, and so early in the year too.

Yeah. I'm not so comfortable with that idea if it turned out to be a four year old girl or something. I'm sure the smell of burning flesh isn't quite the aroma one's home would go for either.

But I guess I'll hope it landed in a sadist's house. That's a pretty nice treat.

I'm sure the girl will get over it. [Yeah. Vegeta had a fucked up childhood.]

I don't know though, Tenten. If it did you'll be having some freak make lamps and furniture out of the bodies. I don't know about you but even that's a little too much for my tastes.

[But his childhood was not that fucked up. Sort of.]

I'd still feel bad. I mean, she's probably experienced worse but I don't want to add onto the trauma plate. [ Tenten's... more considerate than Vegeta. This is weird. ]

That's a little too much for my tastes too. I don't want a skull lamp made out of an actual skull. [ beat. ] That's just tacky.

[It's never weird for someone to be more considerate than Vegeta.]

I agree. As much as I enjoy making my enemy suffer, I certainly don't want to keep them as a souvenir in my living room. The couch and the TV work just fine for me, thanks.

The only souvenirs I'm keeping are the weapons they drop! Sometimes, the people you best in combat have insanely good weapons! [ Like that wonderful wonderful banana fan! ]

Tenten, you're beginning to make yourself sound like a hoarder. Perhaps you should think about seeking professional help. [He's not being totally serious but still, the woman has so. Many. Weapons.]

A hoarder collects the unnecessary and then takes it for granted! I collect the necessary and I polish them, sharpen them and name them and I do this every day! [ Vegeta you just opened up Pandora's Scroll. ]

6th Taunt | Video

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