misterbrief | 12th Taunt

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12th Taunt | Action

Hey! Get me out of here! What are you doing?!!!

[Are the words floating inside of your head. Something is yelling at you, but who knows where's it's coming from? Maybe it's from inside your cupboard. Or you're crushing it underneath your butt as you sit down on your couch, or you roll over on it when you turn in your bed.

Maybe it's been dropped into your pot of water that you're thinking about heating up soon for your dinner, and you are now threatening to boil it alive.

Or maybe something less dangerous, like in your pocket or backpack. Either way, it's found its way into your life somehow, and boy is that thing angry. Real angry. Upon inspection, or finding said thing, you'll find a frog. A mean, nasty, angry frog who's suffered from a shift occurring inside the village. Seems the only power he's retained is his telepathy, thankfully. Sort of. Depends if you want to hear the guy or not.]

Find a way to fix this immediately!

[Find him anywhere you want. Being a frog sucks, but the prince doesn't really have a choice in the matter. If you happen to be the kind of person who would kiss a frog, just like the children's tale, maybe he'll turn back into a prince.]

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[WOAH huwaaah swinging back and forth he doesn't like that]

Stop that!

I'm not a frog, darn it! Those blasted shifts turned me into one! That's what I've got to be so crabby about, thank you!

[Stop? That's one way to ensure that Firo keeps going.

Despite the fact that a telepathic frog is really bizarre, Firo smiles skeptically at said frog's insistence that he's something else. Yeah, right.]

Not a frog, huh? You some prince under a spell, then? This ain't a fairy tale, you know.

[His whole body seizes up with anger just at the very words uttered out of Firo's mouth. He swings from his hand helplessly, fury building until he lets it all go right at him.]

What would you know, huh????!!!!! When I get my body back I'm going to teach you a lesson!

[Vegeta this isn't how you make friends dude]

[It feels pretty weird to have someone yell in his head, and though Firo doesn't release the frog, he does wince.]

Yeah, I bet your body's real scary.

[If only you knew, Firo.]

You little punk! Wait until I get my hands on you-!

[He says as he flails his cute little froggy feet. Yep. Totally going to do so much with those hands.]

[He frowns, irked by the insult. And annoyed at himself for being insulted by a frog.]

I wouldn't be callin' anyone else "little," if I was you.

[In spite of himself, he does feel a little bit of sympathy for the struggling frog, so he cups it in his hands instead of letting it dangle.]

And by the way you talk, I bet you're not that tough when you're not a frog, either. If you're even tellin' the truth about that.

[This boy he makes him so mad time for revenge! He might be powerless, but one thing he does have is strength in his hind legs. He'll show Firo, he swears it.

When he's cupped, he squirms out from underneath the hand on top of him (if that's how Firo did it instead of open palmed), and LEAPS RIGHT AT FIRO'S FACE, STICKING HIMSELF WITH HIS LITTLE FROGGY STICKY FEET RIGHT OVER HIS NOSE AND MOUTH.]

How's this!!!!!

[EW, EW, WHAT

Firo flinches away, but he can't avoid the frog flying at his face. Vegeta hits right on target as Firo tightly shuts his eyes to try and spare them from the touches of those little feet.

Opening his mouth probably isn't the greatest idea right now, but he does it to shout:]

Get offa' me you little--!

[Not used to being a frog quite yet, he tries to hang on but his front little feeties lose their grip and he feels himself sliding down Firo's face...

And somehow the front end of him ends up in Firo's open mouth, staring down his gullet.

OH THIS IS NOT WHERE HE WANTS TO BE.]

RIBBIT!!!

[Firo's wound up eating some strange things in his life, but right now he's pretty sure the last thing he wants in his mouth or stomach is this frog. But things aren't looking so good...

He jerks his head forward to try and spit the little villain out, all the while fighting the need to breath in.]

[He flies off of Firo's face when spat out, losing his grip now with his hind legs and falls, screaming in frog language all the way down.

He lands on the ground with a thump, and he's dazed for a second. What. Just happened.]

[Firo stumbles back, spitting and spluttering to get the taste out of his mouth.]

You son of a--! Why the hell'd you go and do that?!

For your insolent mouth, that's why!

[He flips himself upright, looking upward. Well, he's got to admit to himself, if Firo wanted to kill him right about now, he just might be able to do it. He didn't ever imagine he would die by getting stepped on.

But yet, he still runs his mouth because he's so angry.]

I'm insolent?

[He crouches down to glare at the frog, though he's careful to keep his face from getting too close.]

You've been runnin' your mouth insultin' me too! I could squash you right now, you know!

[He'd ball his fist up if he could, though Firo might notice the front right leg of the frog attempting to make itself into a fist and failing miserably at it.]

You? Squash me? You don't have the guts! You wouldn't be able to live with the fact that you killed a helpless villager who couldn't even defend themselves!

[OH BOY IS HE READY TO MOVE JUST IN CASE FIRO DOES HAVE THE GUTS]

You really think so, huh? I got news for you, pal, I'm not as nice as some a' the other chumps out there!

[He crawls forward--thank goodness none of his housemates are here to see him on the floor yelling at a frog--and raises his hand as if he's going to strike.

...In reality, he just wouldn't feel right killing something so much smaller than him. If Vegeta doesn't get out of the way, he's just going to pick the frog up again.]

[NOW

He sees the hand raise, and is anticipating Firo to try to smack him, so he leaps forward! Not onto Firo's face, but he's hopping as fast as he can to get under him. Go Vegeta go, hop hop hop before the boy smushes you!]

[Oh, crap, this wasn't what he wanted to happen!]

Hey! Get back here!

[He scrambles to his feet and chases after Vegeta, trying to corner him.]

[KEEP GOING KEEP GOING

LOOK FOR SOMETHING IMPORTANT ON THE FLOOR

HE WILL PEE ON EVERYTHING YOU LOVE]

Ribbit! [He croaks, in some kind of way that might resemble froggie laughter. He's getting awayyyyy but he doesn't know where to go. THE COUCH. Run for the couch! He hops out of the kitchen and is beelining it there!

HE WILL GO UNDER TABLES ON HIS WAY THERE TOO IF HE HAS TO will he be cornered before he reaches the other side?!]

[The way out toward the couch is clear, so Vegeta should be able to hop along unimpeded!

While that fact is fortunate for the frog, Firo doesn't like it quite so much. He dives on the floor, hands reached out to grab for the frog!]

[Caught! He squirms in Firo's grasp, trying to slip out.]

Let go of me, boy!

[Victory! For now. Firo's not holding on too tightly to avoid crushing the little villain.]

No! Don't go callin' me "boy" when you're just some frog!

[If Firo were brighter, he might recall that this frog talks to him a lot like someone else. Then again, there are a lot of people who've spoken to him like this.]

Then I'll make you let me go!

[He does the most undignified thing ever but he's literally got nothing else

Pees on Firo's hands]

You'll--?

[Oh

No.

It takes Firo a moment to realize what just happened. Did the frog just ooze frog juice on him? No, no, that's definitely... Yuck.

He abruptly drops the frog and stands up, as if that will be enough to save him.]

You little son of a--!

Hahahahaha! [He cackles gleefully in Firo's head, and will promptly try to forget he ever resorted to such a tactic to free himself. Hopping away with as much speed as a tiny frog his size can muster, he's still booking it for the couch.]

My, what a mess! A responsible adult would clean that up right away-!

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