misterbrief | 4th Taunt

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4th Taunt | Video/Action

[Video]

[In the last few months after arriving in Luceti, Vegeta (somehow) has managed to meet a variety of the inhabitants, somehow miraculously making "friends" and creating enemies alike, but he's noticed one common theme among almost every person he's come across.

This absolutely strange obsession everyone seems to have with his hair.

Which today, has prompted the Saiyan Prince to angrily express himself on the matter.]

Listen. I know most of you may not know me, but if we cross paths- yes, this is my actual hair. [He turns his head so the video can clearly catch all of his anti-gravity mop.] It's not held up by any artificial means, it's not a wig. I don't use this "industrial style hair gel" some speak of, I don't blow dry it to perfection, and I certainly have no intention of letting any of you try to brush it, comb it, touch it, or otherwise come near my hair to satisfy your curiosity.

A Saiyan's hair does not change from the moment they are born. I've always had this hair, though I have cut it to this length to match earthling hair, as it was much longer in the past. [His daughter made him cut it. It was nerdy.]

So I don't want to hear anything more about it, from anyone, or I'll be more than happy to blast you.

[Action]

[He's going to either be at home in Community House 3, at Seventh Heaven getting a meal, or training at the Battle Dome, if you'd prefer to run into him instead.]

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But then you leave room for bigger weeds. [He shrugged.] It's a lose-lose. Besides, it's more fun to punch a few guys out and fight 'em later. Getting rid of it for good can make things a bit too quiet.

Edited 2013-03-03 20:11 (UTC)

The weed won't return if you do a good enough job of applying the weed killer. [He smirks, chuckling quietly.]

On the contrary. If I can defeat someone so easily then they probably don't deserve to live. And I wouldn't bother fighting them again, there would be no challenge in it. And I do like a challenge.

Hate to tell ya, but your weed killer might not work 'round here. People tend to get angry when their pals are 'blasted to oblivion.' And they'll be back in a week, in these parts.

[What was he going to do? It was basic social navigation.]

Why not try a different challenge? There's plenty of little guys in this place, even the ones who do fight. If you're that strong, try to take it out elsewhere. I here there's some jobs that'll get you outta this place and blastin' some guys that really need it.

I did take a look into these "missions" available to us. I'm not entirely keen on doing any sort of work for the Malnosso, I'd rather let them rot than help them. They can take care of their own mundane tasks. [Who is one of the best at holding a grudge? This guy.]

Though it is tempting, nonetheless. I would love to test my mettle against the rabble outside of Luceti. I hear they're worthy adversaries. [His eyes gleam at that. Saiyans and their thirst for battle.]

I ain't too keen on it either, but ya take what ya can get. I dunno 'bout you, but there's some things I'd like from home. If doing dirty work for them can get me a decent fight and a way to get my stuff? It's not too bad a trade...

[He smirked, clearly enjoying the thought of getting out there and bashing heads more than he was letting on.] I'd like to take on a few of those guys myself. One of these days, I think I'm gonna sign on just to see what's out there.

Hmf. The only thing I'd want from home is my gravity chamber, and I'm not entirely sure if I can even have that. [At least he's pretty sure he can't. It's awfully large and the Battle Dome already had a gravity setting, which wasn't nearly strong enough for the Saiyan.]

You also thirst for battle, eh? Well I hope you're prepared to take my method and end the lives of every enemy on the battlefield. I think leaving them alive for another round would be an unwise decision.

If someone's out to kill me? I'll get 'em first. No worries. I don't play games like that.

[But the comment got him wondering...]

What do you need a gravity chamber for anyway?

Hah, sounds like we're going to get along just fine. [Though Vegeta enjoys toying with his enemies first, but hey, in the end they're dead, right?]

I use it to train. You see, mine had a far higher capacity than the options the Malnosso provide in the Battle Dome. My old chamber could reach gravity of five hundred times Earth's gravity. You would be amazed at the results of training in that sort of environment produces; in fact, I think you would be quite pleased.

Training in denser gravity, huh?

I get it. My home's also got gravity that's heavier than Earth's. Not five hundred times....more like three, but Earthlings don't really stand much chance against us.

Never thought of training like that, actually. It sucks that we don't have that kinda tech here.

It's too bad you couldn't train on my old home planet. It was roughly ten times Earth's gravity. But you can actually achieve that here. The Battle Dome has an option that goes up to ten.

So you're not human? Mind enlightening me on the matter?

Ten times? Wow! And I thought I was bad! [If the same physics applied to this guy's world...]

That system sounds way more interesting than most of the simulations in the Dome. The enemies, anyway. It ain't so bad for places. At least, it's doing nicely for replicating my ship--may she rest in peace.

...you can probably guess, but I'm from a place where space travel is pretty common. And no, I ain't from Earth. I'm a Klausian, but that doesn't mean anything too special. We don't have any wings or fuzzy ears or any talent for Symbology. We're just stronger and tougher than most Earthlings.

It sounds like you're not so different, stranger. Got a name?

Edited 2013-03-07 04:39 (UTC)

The Dome is barely sufficient for any sort of progress, but I guess I can't say I'm like most of the beings here. And yes, I too am from another world. Traveling from planet to planet is something I'm quite used to. I happen to reside on Earth however, as it has become my new home.

You can call me Vegeta. Prince of all Saiyans. And yours?

Cliff Fittir, no fancy title. A member of Quark...not that it matters here. Sorry if I've been too casual, your Highness. I'll remember that for the future.

I can't say I'm that fond of the Earth myself, even if the food's great and the people are actually pretty cool. It's politics, and they ain't always clean.

[He'll give a dismissive wave of his hand. He doesn't actually care if he's addressed by his title, he's been called solely by his name alone for quite a long time and doesn't demand he be addressed as such. He just likes people to know of his status.]

Their politics mean nothing. I've not even bothered to pay attention to it anymore, since they have no issues being paraded around by a loud mouth fool who only knows the volume of his own voice and his own idiocy. [They seriously did all the work for this guy, and Mr. Satan gets all the credit.] It disgusts me. [But other than that, he doesn't think it's all that bad.]

You get used to it after a while, I suppose. I can think of much worse places to live.

[The silent cue was enough for Cliff to understand the gist. Like his status in Quark, Vegeta's title didn't matter terribly much anymore.]

Wow. That...? Man, you got me again! The Earth I know of back home wouldn't tolerate that kinda crap. [Not at all in the long run...]

It prob'ly ain't that bad a place at all, but they're involvement in interplanetary politics is the issue I've got with them. It's all a mess of...gah. What's that term from those history classes? 'Imperialism.'

That's the best comparison I've got.

Let me say this; it's quite a long story as to how the Earthlings look up to this moron. But he served his purpose, at least.

Well Cliff, it sounds like our universes don't differ much from each other. But I can tell you that if it works in your world in the same way it does mine, there will be some who will rise up; and when they do they will destroy whatever brainless halfwit that controls the galaxy. What goes around comes around, as they say. [And with that he grins; suck it Frieza, suck it.]

Don't worry. Something like that's already happening. Kinda.

[It was complicated. Between the interplanetary war going on, Quark's attempts at banding underrepresented populations together, and the threat of destruction...there wasn't much else to do but retaliate.]

It's complicated. [He shrugged. That was just how it rolled.]

...Now I'm wondering what else our worlds've got in common. It's an odd coincidence.

Edited 2013-03-10 05:42 (UTC)

I can tell you now that my world has this irritating tendency to attract every sort of vile being in the universe. And every single one of them as the ability to destroy entire planets without any effort whatsoever, with their energy alone. It's especially irritating when they decide to step on my house.

...Other than that I'd say it's a pretty normal existence.

We don't really have much of a problem about anyone destroying planets. [Except when they did.] Remember what I said about politics? There's this Federation...and, in my opinion? It could be run alot better.

Edited 2013-03-11 14:08 (UTC)

I'm surprised you even want an organization like that running your universe. [His experience was of course not so great, as he practically lived in slavery to a certain extent.]

What exactly is it that they do besides force worlds into their reign?

Who said we want it?

[The Klaus system had utterly rejected the invitation to join the Federation right from the beginning and, even though they had been connected with the interplanetary scope of civilization for only a century, Cliff had a hunch that the sentiment wouldn't change.

He groaned under his breath at the mere thought of explaining this.]

The organization calls itself the Pangalactic Federation and, suffice to say, their job is to keep peace in the galaxy. At least, that's the party line...they don't do a good job of it.

It was founded on Earth. So. Ya see my problem now?

Edited 2013-03-12 14:45 (UTC)

Hmf. I'm surprised those idiot Earthlings even had enough drive to create something of the sort. They're not the brightest creatures I've ever met, not as a society at least. [He did know a few smart humans, but they were few and far in between. And even then he didn't consider them to be all that intelligent.] But I suppose the humans of your world might prove to be different than the ones I know. I will say if the human species has taught me anything, it's not to underestimate them. Despite the fact that they haven't proven to me to be smarter than a rock, they have proved themselves in other ways.

Perhaps it is not Earth you should hold your grudge against, but rather the ones that work at the head of this Pangalactic Federation. I'd cut the head off of the beast, but...that's what I would do.

[Vegeta is definitely the kind of guy that does what needs to be done even if it's not the most tactful way, or the way everyone else would want. Like getting good service at a restaurant. If you get bad service he'll make sure you get good service next time even if it means he punches someone out.]

[There was tact and there was picking your battles, in Cliff's mind. He followed the same advice that he gave to his fallen opponents in most every conflict that he encountered, whether it involved fists or words.]

Know your enemy before you strike the first blow, Vegeta. Remember that weed killer from before? Taking out the top guys would only get me and my people tossed into jail. Now, I don't mind prisons myself, but some of my people might not appreciate what's in store there. Whips hurt no matter what world you're on.

Edited 2013-03-13 21:15 (UTC)

I know this Cliff. The regime I am familiar with attempted to take over the galaxy planet by planet, hiring my people to do its dirty work. And it wasn't even that much- we practically lived in slavery. We would have all been killed if we didn't do the bidding of that monster. Even then! Even then he...

[He looks away for a second, teeth grinding. Even so long ago, it still burns within him. But he regains his composure to continue.]

When Frieza, his brother, and his father were defeated their entire organization slowly fell. Word spread that there was a fighter stronger than them, and it dissipated into nothingness, knowing no one would be able to stand up against this warrior. That is why I say to go for the head. If they can be defeated, then who else is there to stop you. Of course I understand you can't just rush in with no training under your belt, you need enough to win- but once you are strong enough, then they should be dealt with accordingly.

[Cliff listened silently as Vegeta explained his piece and found that he finally understood why Vegeta's strategies were so direct; there was nothing else to do.]

...Yea, I don't think we're talking about the same thing here. Your strategy works damn well in those situations, but they're not the ones I'm dealing with. There's politicians back home, not warlords, that run the place. They're just a bunch'a paper pushers that know a few good lines and can smile while they toss around numbers and call it war.

As much as I'd like to punch a few of them out? Anarchy is worse.

Edited 2013-03-15 01:24 (UTC)

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